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I Am Not Black, I Am Fair Skinned…

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I am not Black, I am Fair Skinned…

What do you think about this?

Some weeks ago, On Naomi Campbell’s modelling TV competition called, The Face, U.S talk show host Wendy Williams interviewed a black model called Devyn.

      DevynDevyn

Wendy: Is it hard to be a black girl model?

Devyn: I don’t really consider myself to be a black girl model. I mean, I know what my ethnicity is, but I’m fair-skinned and I feel like I have an international look.

English: Naomi Campbell at the Cannes film fes...

Supermodel, Naomi Campbell.

Naomi Campbell wasn’t happy about Devyn’s statement and Campbell was heard in the background saying things that I won’t repeat here. However, there are supermodels darker than Devyn, such as, Grace jones, Naomi Campbell, Iman and Alek Wek, who have all appeared in international shows for the world’s most popular couturiers. So what was Devyn thinking?

Her comment was considered to be outrageous, and it sparked controversy, but my guess is Devyn was just saying what many people think. I understand that dark skinned models have had to fight to get to where they are today, and she doesn’t want the stigma that is attached to it. I get that.  As far back as the eighteenth-century, prominent scientists such as Robert Knox and his peers, went out of their way to prove that non-white people were genetically inferior to white people, and for many years this was the hypothesis regarding race. If you truly want to depress yourself, you can read Knox’s paper called The Races of Men. Nevertheless, between slavery, colonialism, and apartheid society has been told that non-white skin is wrong, unworthy, unsexy, the opposite of angelic, doesn’t sell, blah, blah blah.  People read and watched those disseminated messages, until they believed and internalised them.

Internalised racism. How about that? Racism against yourself.

It is one thing to succeed in colonising a country, but when you have successfully colonised a mind, you have succeeded indeed.

Sandra Laing’s life story is an example of a family that never came to terms with its apparently black heritage, and it eventually tore them asunder. Sandra was born in apartheid South Africa in 1955, to two white parents. Sandra however, had afro hair and darker skin.  The white middle classed, pro apartheid society that she lived in, considered her to be black, and her father had to undergo a blood typing test to prove that she was his daughter. I saw the biographical story, and I personally believe that he had love for her. He worried about her wellbeing, drove her to school on her first day, held her hand, consoled her…All the things that a loving father would do. But there was something sinister about this love, because her parents could not accept that she was black. They loved her on the condition that she must think herself white, and learn to behave like a white person. How does one do that?

At one point Mr Laing took his case to court and fought a legal battle in order for Sandra to be reclassified as a white person, so that she could attend an all white school. Her parents sent her on a series of dates with white boys, in order that she could be assimilated into the white Afrikaner society. The experience with the first guy she dated was just plain awkward. The white Afrikaners in the restaurant that they went to, made it clear that her presence, or her black presence with a white boy, was unwelcome. She eventually excused herself, went to the ladies bathroom and climbed out of the window to escape. (I would have just opted for the door.)  She was driven home by one of her father’s black labourers, whom she later fell in love with. This was when her father’s love began to run dry. He didn’t seem as if he would tolerate her copulating with a black man, and at one point, Mr Laing loaded a gun and began shooting at her lover.

Sandra became pregnant and was made to choose between her parents and her boyfriend, she chose her boyfriend and moved to Swaziland with him. Whilst Sandra’s mum made some effort to be reconciled with her, Mr Laing disowned her. Sandra married the black man who later divorced her for being a ‘white curse’ on him….You just can’t win can you?

According to the ‘one-drop rule’ it only takes one drop of blood, somewhere in you, for you to be classified as black. We are what we are, and I think that there was black blood somewhere in the Laing family lineage. If her parents could have accepted that, they would have saved themselves a lot of strife.

Mr Laing died before meeting Sandra again, and when Sandra finally traced her mother, years later, Mrs Laing was also dying. An entire family was destroyed.

Personally, I think it’s a sad day when anyone, black or white, has to negate their heritage, either because they don’t feel comfortable with it, or because they have been made to feel uncomfortable about it.

Knowing who you are has to be the best thing that you can do for your self-esteem.

I’m not sure about you, but I always find myself drawn to people who are comfortable in their own skin.

Read more from me on the AOL News Website Hufiington Post U.K. 

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Death Becomes Them: The Gay and Lesbian Witch Hunt…

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Death Becomes Them: The Gay and lesbian Witch Hunt…

English: Gender symbols for homosexuality (les...

Presenter-So are you telling me that if you see gay people here and you know they’re here, you will burn them?

Steven-For sure I’ll burn them…I don’t care even if it’s my own brother, my own son, I will burn him.

This is Mtwapa, Kenya, 2010. Steven is the speaker for an angry mob that are looking for some men that the national media have ousted as being gay. The indignant gang are waiting for an opportunity to kill the gay men and rid the community of their illegal and apparently inhuman shenanigans. You can be sure that all sorts of illegal or immoral activities take place in the community, such as theft, murder and child marriage, but none of those illicit such emotional responses as that of homosexuality. Kenya isn’t isolated in this matter and homosexuality is illegal in Sudan, Tunisia, Ghana, Mauritius, Nigeria, and the list just goes on. There are also disparities in terms of law, which I presume are based on culture. In some of the aforementioned countries, sex between two men is prohibited, but between lesbians it is perfectly legal.

I doubt that the men above would have raised an eyebrow, had several women been ousted as lesbians. I presume that they would have located some cameras and sought to document the evidence for their own personal gratification. But should members of the lynch mob have time for all of this? One in two people in Kenya live in complete poverty, and certainly, several members of that mob wouldn’t have had the privilege of regular meals, sanitation or clean water. Under these circumstances you could be fooled into thinking that they would have more pressing issues to consider than policing the lives of homosexuals.

Thousands of miles away, in Nebraska, United States, a woman has her house bombarded by a group of men that physically attack her. By the time it is over she has sustained severe cuts all over her body and her home has been doused with oil and set on fire. It happened for one reason only. The fact that she is a lesbian. How can those men justify the vindication? In the U.S. Jay and Young 1979, conducted a study revealing that 40% of gay men and 39% of gay women had attempted or seriously thought about suicide, at some time or other. No doubt that it is a direct result of the harassment that they receive.

Having worked in social housing in London, I witnessed first hand the hate crime that LGBT (Lesbian Gay Bisexual Trans-Gender) people were subjected to. Faeces posted through their letter boxes, physical assaults, and other forms of social recriminations. The victims came to our offices seeking refuge or some form of anonymity. The notorious case of 11-year-old Damiloa Taylor who was stabbed near the North Peckham housing estate in 2000, struck a chord with many people across the country. He bled to death 30 minutes after the attack. Before his death, Taylor had suffered vicious and sustained homophobic attacks at school by a group of boys. Ultimately, the 11-year-old boy may have been killed because the bullies thought he was gay, though there has been no evidence to suggest that Damilola was actually gay.

President Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner, with...

Back in Kenya, the stigma of being gay has driven a young man called Melvin into hiding. When his family discovered his sexual orientation they reportedly whipped him and cast him out of their community.

As fierce as his lashings may have been, they weren’t loud enough to conceal the voice of Bishop Julius who was busy declaring that…

The sodomy people, the homosexuals are even more stupid than dogs. There is no female dog that mates with a female dog, or male dog with a male.

The government and church leaders in Kenya blame all traces of homosexuality on western colonisation,  in-between denying its existence in their country altogether. Melvin knows that it is a lie, he turned to prostitution  to support himself and his young sister and receives 3-4 male clients per night. Because Melvin cannot access healthcare without fear of attack, he continues to spread his HIV to all the men that he sleeps with for money. This is also because the men demand and pay him more for unprotected anal sex.

Many people despise homosexuality, and their reasons may be cultural, (they are entitled to their opinions), for others it is biblical (we all know or have access to what is in the bible or Quran etc). We know.

I am not here to act as an advocate for gay and lesbian people, but hatred of homosexuals does not excuse whipping, attacking or killing them. There is no need for anymore physical action. We have heard you loud and clear.

*Some quotes and scenarios refer to Africa’s Last Taboo. Copyright, Channel 4.

Read more from me on the AOL News Website Huffington Post U.K. 

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Usain Bolt Is More Than A Champion, He Is The People’s Athlete

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Usain

Usain Bolt is More Than A Champion, He Is The People’s Athlete 

Diana was the people’s princess and Usain Bolt is the people’s athlete.

Elated after his 100 metre finals win in London, the lightning Bolt paced around the track, sauntered in front of fans and then finally threw himself into a crowd of well-wishers. It was literally history in the making.

To be able to run a 100 metres in 9.63 seconds is an achievement that other sprinters can only dream of, and you could have flown a plane in the distance between him and his competitors at the finishing line. After the race, fellow 100 metre participant,  Richard Thompson of  Trinidad and Tobago could not help but state that Bolt was ”the greatest sprinter of all time.” But I believe that what Usain Bolt has going for him is his humility, generosity of spirit, and child-like willingness to embrace his people.

Birmingham and Jamaica sign 2012 deal

Birmingham and Jamaica sign 2012 deal (Photo credit: Birmingham News Room)

When Bolt swaggered into the 2012 opening ceremony bearing his country’s flag not just Jamaica, but the whole world became unified in acknowledging him as the greatest sports personality of our time. No other athlete’s presence conjured as many cheers as that received by Usain Bolt. As the camera panned across the rest of the Jamaican team that were walking behind him, anyone could concede that they were completely happy to have him as their leader, and respect from your peers is respect indeed.

During an interview after his win, the U.S national anthem began to play in the background as Sanya Richards-Ross, winner of the women’s 400 metres final stood to  receive her accolade. The interviewer tried to speak through the anthem, but Bolt promptly stopped his interview, leaving the interviewer to wait as he stood in silence in respect of the U.S. anthem, until it was over, and then continued his interview. This can only be defined as sincere humility coupled with true sportsmanship.

Nevertheless, amidst, the worldwide acclaim and scepticism,  Bolt’s focus was always fixed on success and in the same interview he remarked, “It was all about business today, I came out  to defend my title and that’s what I did.”

100m: Usain Bolt

100m: Usain Bolt (Photo credit: Sum_of_Marc)

Not many sportsmen are as quick on the uptake when it comes to utilising their fame and success to help others. Bolt on the other hand has wasted no time in setting up the Usain Bolt Foundation in Jamaica. “Creation of Opportunities Through Education and Cultural Development,” is the mission statement of his organisation. To date the foundation has spent $4 million to renovate a dilapidated health centre in his birth parish, built state of the art facilities in local schools and Bolt himself has spent time and energy with the young people that the foundation nurtures.

At times, Jamaica has been plagued with some negative publicity, as with many other third world countries. Usain Bolt has silenced the critics and proved that greatness can and does emerge from their country.

Bolt’s recent success at the 2012 Olympics was timely, as it came just hours before Jamaica was due to celebrate its 50th year of independence from the U.K.

There are many Jamaicans waving their flags because of Bolt,  but it has to be said that he has made so many other countries proud. I speak for millions of people around the world in wishing him and Jamaica the best of luck in all that they do.

Read more from me on the AOL News Website Huffington Post U.K. 

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Marrying Into Class: Are You Too Poor to be Posh?

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English: London's Regent Street

Marrying into Class: Are You Too Poor To Be Posh?

The summer heat may have been clouding their mind-sight as 24 single young and attractive women of all races, cultures and creeds, queued up to introduce themselves to one apparently eligible man. Attractive as the ladies were, they were also very ordinary, and their professions included a mental health nurse, a stripper and a single mum.  They were black, white and Asian, Christian, Muslim and Atheist. They all had one thing in common, a desire for an affluent lifestyle.

The women were somehow selected to vie for the affections of a 23-year-old Romeo, with the hopes of winning and entering into a relationship with him. The said Casanova,  flies his own helicopter to Paris, drives around London in a red Lamborghini, was born into money, educated at Eton and Made in Chelsea. A few years ago, Spencer Matthews wouldn’t have looked twice at these women, but apparently everything is changing.

Up until now social stratification had us believing in class denominators. Upper class, middle and lowest of all, (cringe as you say it) working class. Only 1-2% of the entire human population are regarded as belonging to the upper classes, and those people are usually perceived with a degree of contempt. They are the ruling families, titled people, and those within former religious hierarchies. You were born into your class, and there wasn’t too much opportunity for social mobility, if you were really lucky you could work your way up from working class to middle class.

Although you may resent the upper classes, a tiny part of you would be happy to live their rather comfortable lifestyle. Personally, I would be happy to have a huge estate, a butler, and a bank account with a bottomless pit.

Today the doors are opening for working and middle class people to marry into any class they want to. But is it important? And why should we care? People often think that those from the upper classes are more important or intelligent than everyone else, and I personally think that such notions are ridiculous.

Being upper classed just means you were born into inheritance, usually in the form of land and estates. It does not mean that you have achieved anything through your own attainment. You don’t even have to have anything going on between your ears. You can have a title and still sit in a huge estate that you cannot afford to pay the bills for, and there have been instances of this.

English: Wedding of Prince William of Wales an...

English: Wedding of Prince William of Wales and Kate Middleton (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When the world became ecstatic  that Prince William married Kate Middleton, it wasn’t just because she was a nice girl. No. Prince William is upper classed, and Kate Middleton is middle classed. She is a descendent of coal miners and the daughter of a former air hostess and former RAF pilot. She gave women all around the world hope that they could marry into aristocracy, regardless of where they came from. And why not? After both attending St Andrews University, William and Kate are on par with each other, at least in terms of education. Kate’s ancestors were working class, but they moved up with hard work and entrepreneurship, and now they are a part of the British aristocracy.

For those of you who want to marry Prince Harry and become a princess, head to London’s west end, I hear that he is regularly falling out of nightclubs including the Arts Club in Mayfair. Social mobility is on the increase, meaning that you have the opportunity to be in the social class that you have always dreamed of.

Read more from me on the AOL News Website Huffington Post U.K. 

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Do You Have The Guts To Date Outside of Your Race?

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Do You Have The Guts To Date Outside of Your Race?

During my time I have been ‘warned’ against ‘bringing a white man into this house.’ And it doesn’t just apply to me, I suspect that racism is still alive pretty much everywhere.

couple in paradise

couple in paradise (Photo credit: Wonderlane)

Many people do not date outside of their race because they feel as though it would not be accepted within their community. I have a European friend who married a Nigerian man and was swiftly ostracized from her family.  In some Asian cultures if you are unfortunate enough to fall in love with someone of another religion or ilk, you may be killed in the name of family honour. Laura Wilson a 17-year-old teenager may have become the first white victim of an honour killing in Britain. Wilson dated 17-year-old Asian teenager Ashtiag Ashgar, she then confronted his family about their relationship and Ashtiag himself killed her.

Despite this, I have an Asian friend who informed me that even though she has submitted to marrying an Asian man, she will always have an extra marital relationship with a black man. With extreme examples such as the Wilson and Ashgar scenario, my friend has clearly taken a degree of risk in the decisions that she has made. I feel as though her life would have been simplified if she just felt able to marry a black man.

The said stigma could be the reasons why there are disparities among men and women of particular ethnicities who would be prepared to date outside of their race. According to the 2001 UK Census, British Chinese women were 30% more likely than British Chinese men to date outside of their race. Black British men were also 50% more likely than black British women to date outside of their race. Our U.S counterparts tell us that there are approximately 1.8 million more black women than black men, and if it is reflective of the situation in the U.K, why are black British women limiting themselves to black men when seeking a partner? Cooper, an American writer for the San Francisco Examiner, claimed that black churches were the reasons why black women remained single. Cooper insisted that certain beliefs and criteria set out for black women when looking for partners, actually kept them bound and unsuccessful in their search for husbands. No doubt Some of you will find her comments to be debatable.

White Woman, Black Man, Notting Hill, London, ...

White Woman, Black Man, Notting Hill, London, c. 1980 (Photo credit: Dr John2005)

I do agree that, if you have been single for years, and have only dated men/women from one ethnic group, and none of those relationships have worked, perhaps it could be time for you to broaden your horizons and date outside of your race. Those relationships may not have worked because the cultural behavioural patterns and attitudes within that community may have prevented you from being fulfilled. Most people in life want to be with somebody, yet I know many women, some of them in their forties who are in danger of carrying their single-dom into their graves, possibly because they refuse to date men of other races. What do they think that men of one race can give them that other men cannot?

It takes a degree of courage to break the mold and be with someone who the outside world may not necessarily approve of. If you genuinely like someone who just happens to be of another race then I say go for it, don’t stay single because you are clinging on to old customs and cultures that can do you more harm than good.

Read more from me on the AOL News Website Huffington Post U.K. 

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London Olympics 2012

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Have We gained a Legacy or Lost Our Time, Effort and Money?

As something close to chaos descends upon Stratford, it hits home that the Olympics have finally arrived in my neighbourhood, hooray!

English: The 2012 Summer Olympics Olympic Stad...

English: The 2012 Summer Olympics Olympic Stadium at Stratford, London (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There have been endless debates about the olympic winners and losers-I.E those that will benefit from the Olympics and those that will lose out. In September I will be transferring to a university in the heart of the Olympic area and I can forget about student or private accommodation in Stratford as house prices have rocketed. I definitely won’t be alone in my sentiments, come August/September. It is a top U.K university, and second only to UCL in my chosen subject of English,  in London. So I can’t just opt for another university for me and many of its students it’s put up, or pack up.

A good £26 million pound was reportedly spent on the opening ceremony, however the performers weren’t paid, and I think that they should have been. They apparently dedicated one hundred and fifty hours of rehearsal time to make it work.  I watched the opening ceremony with interest along with half of the capital and millions of people across the globe. The arrival of the athletes was fantastic, and off course the sensational fireworks. They were so robust that as I sat in the kitchen watching the screen, our house, and indeed the whole of East London shook simultaneously and it took me a few seconds to realise where it was coming from. It was impressive to say the least.

English: Paul Goodison, British sailor, at the...

English: Paul Goodison, British sailor, at the parade in London to celebrate the achievements of British competitors at the 2008 Summer Olympic and Paralympic Games. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Most people in East London won’t be going to see the games as the high prices mean that only those earning healthy amounts of money and foreigners can afford to buy the tickets. However I heard through the grapevine that tickets for some of the paralympic games are still up for grabs-great news and I would be the first to attend.

The olympics have indeed created jobs for some people and I think that that is a wonderful thing, but compared to the amount of taxpayers money that was spent on it, purportedly £24 billion,  we might have benefited more from putting that money straight into the NHS, or into DWP etc.

Don’t be fooled into thinking that there are equal opportunities for aspiring athletes to succeed in their chosen fields. A third of all 2012 Olympians have been privately educated. Those who attended state schools where certain sports such as canoeing, fencing or horse riding were not on the physical education syllabus, will struggle financially if they wanted to pursue many of those sports.

Lastly the major sponsors. Deep breath. McDonald’s: the biggest McDonald’s in the world has been built around the stadium, how does fast food relate to the games? What are we teaching our children? Coca Cola: What do fizzy drinks have to do with sport, health and wellbeing? I could really rant on, but I won’t. Is it all about the money? To some extent I’m afraid it is.

Alas I am glad to see that Stratford, an area which was once considered distinctly undesirable, has gone up in the world’s estimation. I hope that the legacy, will be a source of inspiration for aspiring athletes from disadvantaged backgrounds, and that there will be funding opportunities for community and social organisations as a result. As I sat down with my family yesterday afternoon to watch the diving competitions, my nine-year old niece was being zealously encouraged by her father to become a swimmer and a future athlete, much to her disdain.

Please do enjoy the fun and frolics of 2012. But as you do,  spare a thought not just for the current athletes that you know and love, but those who may never have the opportunities to compete, those who have been eased out of their neighbourhoods and money that has been spent from an already overstretched public purse.

Read more from me on the AOL News Website Huffington Post U.K.